Sunday, February 3, 2008

Of Love, Valentines And Super Bowl Sunday

This Sunday was superbowl Sunday. I'm not totally sure who was playing. I heard something about there being a "patriotic victory" so I'm assuming that one of the teams has a patriotic name, but frankly, it doesn't matter to me on iota. I'm not a football fan. I can't think of anything more boring that watching a bunch of guys walk around the football field for five or ten minutes doing nothing and then fighting for a few seconds over a mishapen ball (You would think that with all the money they make they could buy each of those guys their own ball so they don't have to fight over one. They fight so much over it, the ball gets squashed)

Now, I'm not the only person who doesn't like football. Yet, many of those people will follow the Super Bowl (and not just to see who disrobes this year). The do so because it is expected of them. Someone I was talking to was afraid to not go to a Super Bowl party at work, even though they had church at that time, because they were afraid of "how it would look" to their co-workers.

Okay, so, what does this have to do wtih love and Valentines Day. A lot of people are the same way about dating and marriage. They play the game even though their heart isn't in it. They believe, like many watching the Super Bowl that it is something they are expected to do. I know I did for years. I would vacilate from thinking I should have a boyfriend and try finding someone online or in the personals never really succeeding. Even going out with a guy who spent most of our time talking about how I could help him with business advice just to stay in the game.

Consequently, Valentines Day (a February traditon much older than the Super Bowl) became a dreaded day. It was the day that one kept score in a way. And I hit the day and always had a big zero on the score board. One more year of losing the game. And what's more like those people watching the game Saturday who really don't like football, I really didn't even want to win in this game. I knew I wasn't marriage material and while that doesn't make me less than human, I thought it did. My best destiny lay outside of marriage and family.

Now, I have never been one to plunk down and suffer through the Super Bowl just because everyone else was doing so. I went to church. I watched part of a Keeping up Appearances marathon on PBS, Part of a Monk marathon on USA and finished up by watching three Law and Orders on NBC. And did not feel left out at all. And I have never felt any compulsion to try to be a football fan one day out of the y ear to "fit in."

So, then why did I feel that way about love and Valentines Day? I don't know. Maybe because it is a bit more universal than football, but the numbers themselves should not make a difference in the person that I am. So, this year, I face Valentine's Day the same way I face the Super Bowl. It's great for those who are dating and married. But it's not for me. And I'm not going to worry about it.

I need neither romanatic love nor a Valentines day gift to let me know I'm loved. My friends, family and most of all God have already demonstrated that to me and God in particular wrote me a love letter and signed it in red.

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